Growing up…

When we are young, we seem to rush the clock… let’s get our license, let’s graduate high school, let’s move out on our own and then… as we enter our adulthood we wonder why the clock doesn’t slow down.

Today, I have a Junior, a 7th grader and a 6th grader. We also have our conference with our Kindergarten teacher. That means I have 2 left home.

As a mom, I’m excited for them. As a mom, I’m sad for me. You see they are growing, having the same rush through time stages and soon it will be saying “Congratulations Graduate” and Leo moving on to his next chapter.

I feel lonely already. I’m trying to make memories with all my children so if something happens they have them to lean back on and take with them. Maybe a tradition they will carry on with.

Depressing that I have missed a bunch of fun things in their lives however I have time and moving forward will be making memories even more now.

Leo, True, Moose, She-ra, Boog, and Goob… I love you so much!!!

Real Life Saga…

Starting a fund … It’s called “Get me out of debt”

How can you help?

Let me know you want to help & Ill send you a random bill to pay for me. I’ll keep the little ones and pay them but you know those $500 medical bills and $800 utility bill can be yours to help me get out of debt…

You in?

Well, that seems smarter to me than a gofund me as you know where the your money is being used, exactly how much and know I’m being legit with it.

Then I can be debt-free, stay home with my kiddos, and sell my Thirty-one bags & such.

Because in the end, it will me that

Still stumbling, yet I’m more alive!!!

Right now I am having a slight pity party. I was hoping to have flown to Columbus, Ohio for the Thirty-One conference to be with my sisters who are on my team, meeting face to face. Instead, I am at home with my brood and keeping up with my day job while trying to not sulk.

Well, why would I wanna do that?? For starters, I need more business and going to conference would have done that by re-igniting my spark. I need a community of people who can push and motivate me in my ups and downs with my business. There are so many other reasons I wished I could go… but the factor for not going is the price of a ticket to get there and back especially when you got into bad debt, have outstanding medical bills, and the ex doesn’t work so they can’t pay child support.

I know, I know… I sound like a pity party of 1… but I’m blessed getting to stay home too. I get to see my lovely family, will be celebrating a 5th birthday with my friend’s daughter, and can get my to do list knocked down a little. I started today by taking 30 minutes, started laundry after Goober went down and worked peacefully in the office at home. I was able to clear the desk and find a large stack of papers to shred as well as try to find uses for some of the products i sell.

Feel free to check out my website: http://www.mythirtyone.com/1940404

40? How’d that happen?

There comes a time when a birthday comes and you either can be upset you havent done certain things you hoped to or you can embrace who you have become.

So, when did I turn 40?? Yesterday. I have decided that embracing the amazing life I have is what I need to focus on and not the “well i didn’t do this or that.” I still didn’t get my surprise birthday party requiring someone to plan and execute it… Maybe by the next decade…

I’d gladly accept orders for Thirty-one on my page on my Fall launch party AKA my birthday rewards. (Fall Launch Party ). I just am looking forward to this DS being my best one I have joined & continue to grow here.

Yes, 40 can be scary but here’s my goals:

1. Smile more with my children & their shenanigans. 🤪

2. Spend more time with my children as time is fleeting.🕰

3. Work better on my relationship with my husband so that my other relationships can grow.👫

4. Work my faith more, not just attending church but living a life God wants me to be living.🙏 ⛪📚

5. Stop caring so much for others approval and more about my family needs, wants and happiness to take priority 👫👱‍♂️👱‍♀️👱‍♂️👱‍♀️👱‍♀️👱‍♀️

6. Build my business. I love it, Im happy with my commissions no matter how small or large they are!📤💲📥

7. Most importantly, devote time & energy to being healthier so that I will be here for my children longer. 🚶‍♀️

So for the next year, I am focusing on these… I know I will stumble, my depression will kick its ugly head up at some time, my kids are gonna make me wish I didn’t have to work and then again wonder why they get dumb over the summer, and more. Life is about accepting and moving forward, not sitting and waiting without trying first.

I know I have done right…

Last night I got a surprise. My amazing 16 year old paid for my hubs and I to go out to dinner at one of the local higher class establishments.

He told the hubs that I was stressed out and we needed to get out. My 16 year old was cognizant of my feelings. He took care of planning it so I had no clue.

We had an hour out… no kids, no phones, no interruptions. We got to see our boy working and enjoying it. He even picked out dessert and plated it himself for us.

I felt relief as this last week mentally was hell for me. I realize he does listen and care.

Love you Leo!!

… CRICKETS…

Sorry for the crickets on my blog lately. Been pre-occupied with my real life issues… insomnia, depression, feelings of failure, and body issues like my right shoulder & rotator tears.

I just wanted to say, I’m here and alive.

Oh, a She-Ra conversation from 345 am today: Daddy, my feet hurt when I walk on them. (She just stood up in the crib where my hubs put her)

Hubs: It’s too early to be awake so go back to sleep and your feet won’t hurt.

She-ra: **lays back down**

Well, I should try and sleep too!! Night!!

Life is crazy and Im still stumbling…

The last few weeks have been crazy!! Between birthday & Fathers Day events to doctor’s appointments that include vaccines & specialist appointments to schedule, to the end of school… Im exhausted!! But another month until I can safely say we should be done with that.

I’m tired with work, but it’s a necessary evil… for now. The hubs and I finally got in & talked with a banker about getting a home equity loan… just looking over the pros and cons & hopefully will help us stop living paycheck to paycheck.

In other news, we have taken in a bunny for a few weeks so I have been blogging with her family too. It’s definitely been fun this week. Boog & She-Ra cut each others hair today… luckily it’s not too bad… unlike when True & Moose shaved each others heads. Goob has been under the weather since Thursday, I stayed home yesterday and well… lack of sleep.

I’m kinda depressed that I have kiddos that are sick and I can’t snap my fingers to be home always with them or make them better… I guess that’s called Mommy Guilt.

Got one kiddo into a painting class for the summer – Moose is learning to paint his D&D figurines. True wants to do soccer this upcoming school year as well as to see if the church she went to quilting class last summer is hosting them again. She-Ra & Boog may start back to their Nonna’s this summer… we shall see.

For me, I have a lot of desires for this summer… like getting this blog going more, my Thirty-One business (www.mythirtyone.com/1940404) to take off and our bills to decrease amazingly.

Yup, me trying

Sleep deprived??

Man, this week has flown by!! Moose turned 11, so we now have 2 (yes 2) 11 year olds in the house. So it’s been a little crazy. We had 5 kiddos in the dentist this week, only 1 having to go back but not for cavities but to have their tooth extracted… yup She-Ra has to have her front tooth pulled because it’s dead and now has an infection, luckily it’s a baby tooth. Plus, the dentist wants a skin tag biopsied so that the poor girl has at the corner of her mouth.

5 hours on Wednesday driving paper routes… my kiddos plus 2 clients routes… please never again!! I felt like it was a constant dream with my client, over and over again grabbing his crotch saying “I want you in my mouth”… the life of working with people with disabilities.

On to life of sitting in my office wishing wasn’t at work… life… day dreaming of the day when I can confidently be unemployed… with children, that will never happen.

Spent an hour with 2 children at a counseling and hopefully it helped… so far it hasn’t…

Forgot that Goob had her 6 month check up… included vaccines. So no rest for this momma as she’d fall asleep then wake up screaming… poor babes.

Have Moose’s party with 6 boys over night… please remind me next year that’s not happening!?! Boys hurting each other’s feelings, not going to bed until 130 and up at 7… I am old and cannot do this up and down all night yelling at children, because the FIRST time telling them to be quiet SHOULD have been enough.

Now onto the weekend… I get to walk for 2 hours for work today and then get the rest of the weekend off!!

HERE’S TO ALL THE OTHER SLEEP DEPRIVED PARENTS OUT THERE… YOU ROCK, YOU GOT THIS!!

Eyes & Ears & Mouth and….

Never a dull moment… eyes and teeth for 5/6 kids…

Leo needed glasses full-time

True needs glasses part-time

Moose only has a minimal astigmatism.

She-Ra will get answers today on her eyes and Booger will find out at the end of the month.

Teeth issues…

True had a sealant.

Moose has 1 of the 12 year molars.

She-Ra finally sat through an entire cleaning and xrays to find out she needs a tooth extracted and a skin tag on the corner of her mouth biopsied.

Booger sat through her cleaning like a pro!!

Next up is gettting my glasses; Leo & my hubs and I dental cleanings; She-Ra a look by her doctor for her biopsy.

School is almost out here… short timers is set in for the kids. For us it’s birthday season.

Ladies day…

Well the boys are out playing D & D which means for us ladies: fake nails on the girls, nail polished watermelons, edible cookie dough, and coffee… along with lots of chatting!!

Should totally be doing more like the laundry… but even us ladies need a day to get our fun on… So now I’m binging “The unbreakable Kimmy Schmit” on Netflix… but it’s definitely not getting my puzzle done or laundry folded.

Yesterday I was able to hang out with one of my bestie’s while we were out rock hunting… didn’t score the prized rock that we were looking for but we found plenty more of amazing art. We don’t get to hang out often enough. Makes me sad some times.

My other bestie, Jess, lives in NY which is completely on the opposite side of the country from me… Miss being able to get together and hang out but we are just able to be like nothing has changed.

My new girlfriends and I have time to chat.

what about you? What are things you like to do???